Forgiveness begins when you…..

1. Accept that life is not fair and that others may play by a different set of rules.

2. Stop blaming others for your circumstances.

3. Understand that you cannot change the person who hurt you; you can only change yourself.

4. Acknowledge the anger and hurt that some unpleasant or even harmful event is causing you.

5. Reframe your story of hurt — your “grievance story” — by placing the hurtful events in a broader context than your current point of view.

6. Recognize that only you can make the choice to forgive.

7. Shift your view of the offender by humbly choosing to empathize with his or her life situation

8. Intentionally move from discontent toward contentment.

9. Understand that forgiveness will take time and cannot be rushed.

10. Take responsibility for your life and your future.

If you want to live, at some point you must choose to forgive.